Dear Jon Bon Jovi

[silverthorne]

This is all your fault.

You see, I always liked your music--from the time that Runaway hit the top forty until even now, when I sometimes wonder if on the new album you're trying too hard to sound like the newbies in the biz. (Please stop, BTW--Your sound is great the way it is. And it still holds up when played side-by-side with the newer kids on the radio. You do not need to have a musical middle-age crisis, I promise.)

And when I'd hear good stuff about you and the band, I always felt kinda proud of you; both because I'm from Jersey myself (Lived in Hightstown for the first twelve years of my life--directly off of Exit 8A on the Jersey Turnpike for those of you who are curious as to where that's at), and because it was COOL to have rockers who weren't total assholes, but weren't all 'Hey, we're squeaky clean dudes who just happen to play hair metal' like Stryper.

But I wasn't a screamy, OMG!SHRIEK!DIE!MUSTKNOWEVERYTHINGABOUTYOU!!!! fangirl, either. You did great music (that I could sing along to, no less, because you guys actually sing), you were cute for long haired fluffballs (although not as cute as my then-boyfriend IMHO), and it was good.

And, as with most teenaged interests, you guys sort of faded from mine once I turned twenty or so and started trying to be all grown-up. Then, even the 'OH WOW NEW SONG" shiny stuff wore off and I would just sort of nod when the American radio stations would deign to play something new of yours.

And then...then there was Derek.

Yeah...remember him? Vampire hunter guy? Role you played a few years back that went straight to video?

Yeah. Him.

I started playing him as a pup in a multi-universal RPG. Just as a lark, mind you. And then he became a hobby and somewhat popular. So...the playing grew, and with it, the need for more icons.

With the need for more icons, came the necessity of scouring the internet for pictures of you. So, eventually it had to happen.

Eventually, I started reading the articles on the sites where I found pictures; started getting a better idea of the man and his bandmates...

Started liking you for you as a real live person and not just the pretty (if eyebrowless) and 'official' PB of my pup.

And then the madness started.

Now, all of a sudden, I have your CDs all over my house. They follow me to work. They're played constantly.

I use one of the game icons here on my RL LJ! (Points to current icon) SEE?!

I was so proud of the local 'cool' rock station for finally getting off their high horse and quit knocking you and playing your new (and old) stuff instead that I bragged about it for a week!

I started scouring real news for stories about you and the band!

Even worse?

I have the goddamned DVR set to record The West Wing tonight, even though I never watch that show--JUST TO GET A FRICKING GLIMPSE OF YOU!!!!!

Damn you, JBJ!!

DAMN YOU ALL TO HELL!!!!!

...

...

Sincerely,
Silverthorne.