Gacked from Ann_mcn

[silverthorne]

*snort...and here my roomate keeps equating me with Elenor...

Not a word, Helen...*winks*


You're Mariane Dashwood from Sense &
Sensibility! You are the romantic
youngster, also found in Jane Austen's work as
Catherine of Northanger Abbey and
possibly Georgiana Darcy of Pride and
Prejudice. You wander through life like Red
Riding Hood in the forest, picking wildflowers
and humming a happy song... and you can't see
the wolf right in front of you! Ruled by heart
and not by head, you are best advised to to
learn a little caution, before you are forced
into a better acquaintance with the ways of the
world.


Which Jane Austen Character Are You?
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Comments

Your comment to me:

[septithol.livejournal.com]

Dear Book_of_Thornes: You wrote: "How convenient. Not only does it make you God, it makes you one very lazy, unfeeling, and selfish 'god'. Did you get pregnant? yes? guess what. your responsibility is to that child, who, although may not be perfect (at least according to your definition), is still a living breathing person, no matter how bloody 'hard' it is for you. Hate to break it to you, but it will never be as hard for you as it is for that kid. Grow up, get some balls, and suck it in."

I am curious. Do you have a disabled child? Or other relative? I have a younger brother who is mentally retarded. I do not think that someone who does not live with a person has any idea precisely what is going to be required to care for that person. Someone else made the comment that 'ordinary kids are a pain in the butt, too'. So they are. But one expects ordinary kids to become independent in 18-25. You will not still be caring for them when you are 80. And what about after you die? Do you feel that your other children (if you happen to have other children) will have some sort of obligation to care for a disabled sibling you chose to give birth to, thereby GREATLY disrupting their lives? Or will that child simply live the next 30-40 years rotting in an institution after your death?

I think it is very easy to sneer at people who decide to abort a mentally retarded or disabled child if you have never had to live with and help care for such a person, and if all of YOUR children are perfect. Here is a suggestion, why don't you go to an abortion clinic and post an ad that you are willing to adopt and be completely responsible for such a child for the rest of your life? Put your actions where your mouth is, otherwise do not pretend that you are morally superior to people faced with a choice you have never had to make.

Re: Your comment to me:

[silverthorne.livejournal.com]

**Pardon for the LJ change--the other one was my game LJ, this is my private LJ**

Hmmmm....Let's see

Two cousins over the age of 20 (one of them is 40 now and still mentally 7). One cousin with ADD. A great Aunt I helped to take care of while she took 8 long aweful agonizing months to die of cancer (and in the last month, she was so far gone that she lay in bed, staring. She didn't even have the strength to close her eyes.) My Grandfather, who died of Leigh Gerricks (sorry, forgot the spelling) disease two years ago on Valentines day, Another grnadmother by marriage, also so infirm (and yet active enough that she could thrash around and sort of peter around the house if you didn't keep an eye on her), that was bed-ridden *and* had Alzhiemers. I got to babysit her on a regular basis so my uncle could actually leave the house occasionally and do something *other* than take care of her.

So, do I have disabled relatives--ones that I've had to at least *help* to take care of? Oh yes, I do, and I did, and I will in the future. And that's not even counting the ones with psychological problems, including myself.

And I *do* work in a hospital--I run the receiving dock. Although I am not directly responsible for any patient care, I am expected to treat the patients, their families, and the medical staff who deal with them (many of whom are pompous asshats), with respect, dignity, and courtesy. Oh, and help them out as well. Which I do--without whining about it or expecting some sort of gracious return.

And, as for the 'Well, they'll still be that way at 80'.

Uh, yeah...and by then my father, who may or may not get any of the diseases mentioned above, or any of several thousand other ones, will need me--his *only* daughter and child, to help take care of *him* like he took care of me in my teen years. Because age is the ultimate crippler--and I am, after all his family. It's an unwritten obligation, or at least it used to be, for everyone</> with loved ones. Not to mention that I love him--that alone is worth any shit I may have to go through in order to help him out when he finally needs it from me instead of the other way around.

As for sneering? Sweetie, I've had an abortion--one that was against my will, but that those of my family who knew I was pregnant pretty much strong-armed me into having. There were no other options of help offered by them or anyone else at the time. It was 'you will' or 'you leave'. I was young, stupid and weak willed and I let them. And even now, I'm sure I'll never forgive myself for abandoning my child that way. If you like, I can give you a whole dissertation on the subject, right down to the scalples they used and the giant shop vac that the fetus was sucked into after they were done scraping it loose. I will note, by the way that although they give you morphine or another pain killer, that it really doesn't keep the sensation of having the insides of your guts ripped loose from hurting--it just makes it so you don't give a shit.

And you know what? If I weren't financially strapped, and knew for a fact that my own mental instabilities would not end up hurting my child in any way, I *would* adopt a child, or three, or five, if it meant keeping them from getting conveniently gotten rid of by way of abortion. Unfortunately, my circumstances and my own suspect nature are not where I would like them to be in order to feel I could raise a child correctly and well. I have plenty of love--but that is often not enough, especially when the mother has a few screws loose.

(TBC...)

Re: Your comment to me:

[silverthorne.livejournal.com]

The people that frequent laguera's board are smart, well educated, and have been through a lot of shit. They've either been through all of this crap, or else have honestly researched it before opening their mouths. As have I--simply because I'm not using million-dollar words doesn't mean I'm not talking from experience. I have disabled relatives that I help take care of, I've had an abortion, I've lived a hard life through to my early adulthood, with a brief 5 year span of sanity when my Father and his parents had legal custody of me while I was in highschool. I have actual mental disabilities that I fight with day after day in order to live a 'normal' life--at least one that is considered 'normal' for most of the adult population.

Although you may have had a few experiences yourself, and a few good points, you are still doing exactly what you're screaming at everyone else here for doing--judging without knowing.

Trust me, we know.

Anne Campbell
AKA Book of Thornes
AKA Silverthorne