You get to say comedy movie things when you're bi...

[silverthorne]

So...wore eye make-up to work today (don't fall over dead in shock, folks), since I'm trying to figure out something good for the yearly company shindig--which I've been told I'm going to, no excuses, now that I do not have a controlling, antisocial SO.

Well, I've been asking folks how it looks, because I would really like to not look like a total idiot when I go (and make-up is...well...pretty much a necessity to Big Events, and something I know nothing about. :/)

Anyhow, she looked, and commented 'You better watch out; you're gonna end up attracting a guy...or a girl...or...something." (She knows I'm bi)

My response?

"I think I'm gonna stick with guys right now. I understand them when all they want me for is dick relief. Girls, on the other hand? I keep finding the crazy ones. That's a pretty good sign I should probably leave the women alone, you know?"

...it made her laugh, at any rate.

Comments

[mephron]

Considering the last person I dated broke up with me because a) my friends were 'too weird' and b) I was too 'intense' in the things I liked?

I think my crazy attractor is on too tight.

[silverthorne.livejournal.com]

Or a really bad case of the Stepford Virus.

Geez, wasn't she paying attemtion when you first met? Or was she one of those 'it's okay, honey, I'll fix you right up!' types?

[silverthorne.livejournal.com]

...that was supposed to say 'Or *SHE* has a really bad case of the Stepford Virus'. Geh. Typing skill. I need to learn me some.

[silverthorne.livejournal.com]

Also, my logic is on her head, not yours. If you're gonna date someone, or want to, might want to take a good look before things get to serious and see if what the other person is into and who they know are things you can honestly deal with. Going in with the attitude of 'oh, I hate it, but I'll ignore it for the So's sake', or, worse, 'I know I cna change them in time' is really...stupid.


Everyone is 'weird', and everyone has different 'weird' thresholds. S'up to a person to find out what they can ahead of time, though, to avoid wandering into something they can't handle. (Which is why, I think, I don't believe in Love At First Sight, and would rather do the 'friends first' thing...because what you're falling in love with is a bunch of uncomfirmed impressions at that point. Takes a while to figure out what you really saw...and what you wanted to see.)

[mephron]

We'd known each other for a while, but I think in this case it falls on my head. I didn't recognize how she was, uh, not quite synching with the world around her - she didn't want to come out to visit me unless it was me meeting her at the bus station in NYC and escorting her the whole way, and then the same back. She's gotten very insular in the past few years.

Then I had a party where she met some of my friends-who-are-not-related-to-her (most of her social circle is relatives) and.... she got a bit weird, didn't want to do much of the party activities (which was basically watch some bad movies and eat food).

Then I was telling her about Dragon*con and she didn't know anyone who was on the guest list except some of the comics artists.

And then she called it quits.

So... dunno. It got squirrely.

[silverthorne.livejournal.com]

That's still her and not you though. Not in the 'she didn't bother to get to know you' way, but in the 'not quite right in the social head' way. And I can say that because that's how I used to be, and what I've defaulted to at the moment while I finish figuring myself out and getting back what's me and not whatever I'd become to be what the ex wanted (or pretended to want).

Sounds like she isn't ready to leave the nest and prefers familiarity to finding her own way. And arguably, that's not an ectual mental problem, but she definitely isn't ready to stand on her own two feet and try new things.

And that, by no means, is your fault. (As in, you can't help that she had social problems. Or isn't ready. Or doesn't deal well with 'strangers'. Or whatever).

[mephron]

Yeah, my problems are a bit deeper and less defensible than that.

But the OK came in for 52 psych sessions friday night (and then tomorrow and wednesday I have off but that might not work too well, and thursday I go to visit a friend until Monday), so maybe I can work on that, too.

[silverthorne.livejournal.com]

As far as I'm concerned, if a person is aware of their problem, and actually tries to do something about it, rather than make excuses, then they're ok. Maybe a little unstable, unsure, whatever. But if you're at least trying to get a handle on it, then you're already lightyears ahead of the ones who know and don't bother--or, worse yet, don't want to bother and use it as an excuse for not living, so to speak. Or, you know, as a way to prey on other people with good hearts.

Seems to me you're fine in that regards. You know; you're trying to 'fix' it. It's all good. :)

*hugs*

[skyshark.livejournal.com]

I love hitting cosmetics books--a glance inside at the bookstore's pretty easy to sneak in, and seeing examples and how they were done is fun. I tend to tone down/simplify most of what I see.

The biggest basic is to remember it's not paint on a wall--your skin will show through and show how happy it is with whatever you put on it. (If it looks like paint on a wall, stop reading this at once and go buy a beauty book.) And you want something that complements your eye color--I've heard it described as "you want people to say 'look at the girl with the pretty blue eyes,' and not 'look at the girl with the pretty blue eyelids.'" Whatever you're putting on comes second. Your face comes first.

/done!

[silverthorne.livejournal.com]

That sounds familiar...did it come from Color Me Beautiful? (One of the beauty books I actually owned at one point. NO idea where it's got off to, though).

My problem is that

1) I can never quite get the instructions right when applying, so it never looks quite right.

and

2) My eyes are honest-to-god green. Not hazel, or green-flecked with brown, or an off-shade of blue, but genuine jade green, so a lot of the suggested color schemes and ready made sets for 'green' eyes don't look quite right once they're on me. They're either too dark or too 'frosty' looking, and either reach too far into the yellow or blue spectrums so either make me look jaundiced or really do make me look 'painted' rather than natural.

I did finally figure out to use a bristle brush on my lids thie morning, rather than a 'regular' eye applicator, though. :)

[skyshark.livejournal.com]

Is that your eye in icon? :D Lovely color!

I think the thing is you have eyelids like mine--deep-set? So if one thing you're trying is the three-color thing, with one in the crease, it's not gonna fly.

Darker color covering the lid--I'd love to see yours with a smoky gray, maybe more silvery than charcoal--and. . . hm. Something lighter up nearer the browline, and you should be good for above. :D The lighter color can blur around a little more, but the lower needs to stay on the eyelid. I'm not sure brown would be my first instinct if I had eyes like that--I'd play with the frosty thing a lot, though, and do a lot with silver and black.

I rarely reach for my makeup. When I want to go somewhere important, though, stand back. XD

[skyshark.livejournal.com]

*deep-set eyes like mine, not eyelids. The point is, though, deep-set eyes need to futz around with the crease less. . . and anyway, I've gotten eyeliner on my brow if I'm not careful and it's wet. :D That's all if your eye is like the one in icon.

[silverthorne.livejournal.com]

yep, that's my eye. :) Want proof I'm half Irish? Look there. *g*

Yeah, I discovered early on that the 'put a dark color in the crease' intruction does nothing for me but make me look like a drag queen that's been in the water. :P

My eyes do tend to reflect certain colors easily, such as blues and greys and certain low-key yellows. I also know the dramatic looks, such as the 'smokey' technique, does me no favors. Neither does eyeliner, really, unless it's subtle and lighter. :(

[skyshark.livejournal.com]

. . . have you tried your favorite blush?

It's not much of an evening look, but it does make your face look. . . warmer, maybe, is the word. And if it's blush matched to your skin, it's gotta not fight too much. :p

[silverthorne.livejournal.com]

Heh. Jun-mun just asked me that in IM.

The problem is that I don't wear blush. I gave up on that years ago because I never found a color that went well with my skin tone.

Pretty much, I dont do makeup. I just started plciking my brows last year (and I'm 38 now). I started with concealer on my eyes because they discolori8ng with thin skin and age. But now I'm about to go somewhere where makeup is pretty necessary (You dont go to a hospital function and not look good. There might be doctors and backers there), so I need to find something that at least looks okay, even if I default to a 'natural' look that doesnt look like I did much.

Problem being of course that I have no idea what looks good--just what doesn't.

[skyshark.livejournal.com]

Hunh. Yeah, I think I'd go with a lot of foundation for an even natural look, and then some kind of maximizer for huge long lashes. :P

[silverthorne.livejournal.com]

I really want to avoid anything heavy.

Fortunately, it doesnt take much foundation to even my eye skin out (Conceeler just sinks into my skin and does nothing). But it also 'washes' me out there, which is why I'm checking out eyeshadow to wear at the shindig. Plain eyes at work is fine--I'm tossing boxes after all. Big fancy dinner though...won't fly. Especially if I'm dressed up. I'll look really off in a nice dress and 'no' makeup.

[skyshark.livejournal.com]

Yep. Something dark there to create a line without putting powder on. But not heavy. :D Just maximizer for more length.

[silverthorne.livejournal.com]

I also have a problem with 'raccoon' eyes--thin skin, lots of blood vessels. So anything dark and/or deep purple tends to make my eyes look bruised and tired.

[rebl1969.livejournal.com]

My eyes are green too, though probably a little more olive than yours. I'm one to talk, because I rarely if ever wear eye makeup (allergies, long story, plus John hates makeup), but I've read that those of us with green eyes are born to wear plum eyeshadow. I actually have plum eyeshadow on my shopping list for when I'm next at the drugstore, so we'll see. I hate what little makeup I own; it's frosty and makes me look like I'm trying to look 13.

Your hair is darker than mine so you could probably wear black eyeliner if you wanted, but I use gray or brown so as to not overpower my face.

[silverthorne.livejournal.com]

Unfortunately, plum is one of the colors that makes my lids and the skin around my eyes look bruised, even with concealer put on first--it was part of one of the 'green eyed' sets I got, and unless I keep it really light (as in, it looks pink when I put it on due to how little I can use), it turns me into walking dead looks wise. :/

I do seem to be having better luck with the greys and smokey blues though...(been messing with makeup tonight).

My eyes are too deeply sunk for dark eyeliner, usually. And the edges where my lashes are easilt seen, so it ends up looking like the line it is floating above the white flesh where my lashes are.

[rebl1969.livejournal.com]

How 'bout gray?

I admit gray is my default "makeup" look, when I bother to put it on. I suck at being a girl. I put on gray eyeliner, smudge it all over the place, put blush on my browbone and go with it. No mascara, no lipstick, just eyestuff and blush. No concealer either; I need it but it's too big a hassle.

Seriously. I had this revelation when I was 17. I had tried for years to do "good" makeup to get a boyfriend or whatever, and then after my junior year I went away for the summer (Governor's School) and all of a sudden my entire beauty regimen consisted of rolling out of bed 10 minutes before class. When I returned to high school in the fall I kept it up and all of a sudden I had boys all over me like white on rice. I'm not quite sure what happened, but I think it had something to do with no longer giving a shit about what the other girls wore or thought. Then, later, I met John, who as previously stated hates makeup, and the rest is history.

I don't know what I'll do if Sophie turns out girly. Get her a mentor, I guess.

[rebl1969.livejournal.com]

Admittedly, the no-makeup look works better on someone who is 17 rather than someone about to turn 39. Which is why I'm thinking about buying some new eye makeup. Nowadays I just look old to myself.

[silverthorne.livejournal.com]

Yeah. I use foundation on and under my eyes, because the skin is thin there and due to age the veins are starting to show. Otherwise though, I've managed to keep my good skin. For now, anyway.

[silverthorne.livejournal.com]

....my wake up regimine has always been 'wake up, roll out of bed, put on clothes, and go'. Only times I ever got into amkeup was for drama class, renfaire later in life, events where it was expected (and usually I had someone else do it for me at that point), and when my friends and I were being...odd. At whch point there was make-up everywhere and not being used conventionally.

Unless you're thinking Twisted Sister or Poison mixed with fantasy concepts is conventional (I once put a sunset on my BF's face). *g*

The grey/blue set I got is going to be tomorrow's attempt. I knew grey and grey-toned clothing tends to get picked up by my eyes, so maybe similar eyeshadow will do me justice where the green mix failed me.